“I am not a lamb!”
Hem here! One of my best friends just opened a nightclub in London, which apparently is the place to be as of yesterday, and last night he was throwing the grand opening party. As I am one of his best friends, I of course get a kind of Hem’s Red Carpet when I attend his events.
Last night I went with some acquaintances, and when we arrived at the nightclub, there were about 80 or 90 people pushing and shoving at the door to and pleading with the doorman to get inside. My friend, the club owner, obviously was showing his face as seldom as possible at the door because if people who barely knew him saw him they would cry “D***! Can you tell these bouncers to let me in??!!”
My friends wanted to wait behind these 80-90 people and push and shove and cry “D***..” as well, but I told them. “Friends, friends… I am not a lamb. [pause] I’m going over to this quiet bar over here across the street to drink a glass of rosé wine and I’ll pass by in a little bit to see if D*** is out front to where he can let me in with my dignity intact.
Now, you might not agree with my reasoning, but I think it’s weak and lamby behaviour to beg and plead to doormen or to anyone else for things. This could apply to reading and writing.
Readers: don’t let novel characters treat you without respect (I think I sound crazy writing that); and writers, don’t beg to get readers to like readers to like your sentences. Tell them your sentences in a way that shows that you assume they love your sentences. You are the kings and queens of your books; and in this world (as long as you also treat others with respect, gentleness and kindness). You deserve to enter any door without pushing, shoving, or begging. If you have to do one of those things, it’s not a door you want to enter. Be strong. Be happy. Have a great weekend.
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