Who Said That? 10 Unbelievable Quotes From Microsoft Execs

steve ballmer head in hands

Last week, Microsoft exec Ron Markezich was quoted saying that for every $1 companies spend on Microsoft software, they need to spend $6 getting it to work right.

That’s an amazing statement coming from somebody in Microsoft’s own sales department. But it’s not the first time that a Microsoftie has stuck his foot in his mouth.

See if you can identify which Microsoft exec made each of the following 10 statements.

To keep it fair, we only took one quote per exec — otherwise, the entire quiz could consist of Steve Ballmer putting his foot in his mouth.

[slideshow]
[slide
permalink=”i-dont-know-whether-the-big-screen-tablet-pad-category-is-going-to-remain-with-us-or-not-1″
title=””I don’t know whether the big screen tablet pad category is going to remain with us or not.””
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[slide
permalink=”craig-mundie-chief-technical-officer-march-2011-2″
title=”Craig Mundie, chief technical officer, March 2011″
content=”In an interview with the Sydney Morning Herald. The kicker: he might actually be right.
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[slide
permalink=”apple-is-selling-zero-phones-a-year-in-six-months-theyll-have-the-most-expensive-phone-by-far-ever-in-the-marketplace–3″
title=””Apple is selling zero phones a year. In six months, they’ll have the most expensive phone by far ever in the marketplace. “”
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[slide
permalink=”steve-ballmer-shortly-after-apples-first-iphone-announcement-in-january-2007-4″
title=”Steve Ballmer, shortly after Apple’s first iPhone announcement in January 2007″
content=”Here’s the excerpt on video.”
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[slide
permalink=”im-a-big-believer-in-failing-fast-if-we-skipped-last-year-we-would-have-never-come-out-with-the-product-we-did-this-year-5″
title=””I’m a big believer in failing fast. If we skipped last year, we would have never come out with the product we did this year.””
content=”Hint: the product was the second generation Zune.”
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[slide
permalink=”j-allard-chief-experience-officer-november-2007-6″
title=”J. Allard, Chief Experience Officer, November 2007″
content=”He also had some interesting things to say about the troubles facing the recording industry.”
image=”http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4bf6df417f8b9a586d3f0200″
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[slide
permalink=”at-one-point-in-the-meeting-i-realized-that-nobody-was-watching-the-football-game-they-were-watching-the-demo-of-kin-and-thats-when-i-knew-i-had-a-partner-who-was-as-passionate-about-this-audience-and-as-passionate-about-the-product-as-we-are-7″
title=””At one point in the meeting, I realised that nobody was watching the football game. They were watching the demo of KIN. And that’s when I knew I had a partner who was as passionate about this audience, and as passionate about the product as we are.””
content=””
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[slide
permalink=”robbie-bach-entertainment-and-devices-president-april-2010-talking-about-verizon-8″
title=”Robbie Bach, Entertainment & Devices President, April 2010, talking about Verizon.”
content=”Apparently he didn’t have high expectations from Verizon’s execs.”
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[slide
permalink=”we-currently-have-a-10-share-of-the-online-ad-market-today-we-fully-intend-to-grow-this-share-9″
title=””We currently have a 10% share of the online ad market today. We fully intend to grow this share.””
content=””
image=”http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4a946e9cdbc9fc220e699dd0″
caption=””
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]
[slide
permalink=”ray-ozzie-then-chief-software-architect-in-november-2005-10″
title=”Ray Ozzie, then chief software architect, in November 2005″
content=”Six years later, the company’s share of ad revenue is below 10%. Microsoft’s ad revenue in the fourth quarter of calendar 2010 was $632 million. The Internet Advertising Bureau said that total online ad revenue during the quarter was $7.25 billion — just in the United States.”
image=”http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4cc5c5b8cadcbbc866170000″
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[slide
permalink=”we-have-no-intention-of-shipping-another-bloated-os-and-shoving-it-down-the-throats-of-our-users-11″
title=””We have no intention of shipping another bloated OS and shoving it down the throats of our users.””
content=””
image=”http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4d5da92c4bd7c82961010000″
caption=””
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[slide
permalink=”paul-maritz-who-oversaw-development-platforms-in-july-1997-12″
title=”Paul Maritz, who oversaw development platforms, in July 1997.”
content=”He was talking to InfoWorld about Microsoft’s approach of creating custom extensions to Sun’s Java language to work better on Windows, undercutting the ‘write once, run anywhere’ goal of Java.”
image=”http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4ca9eb0c7f8b9a70488a0300″
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[slide
permalink=”i-would-buy-a-mac-today-if-i-were-not-working-at-microsoft-13″
title=””I would buy a Mac today if I were not working at Microsoft.””
content=””
image=”http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4eb9b9148c19464856a34300″
caption=””
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[slide
permalink=”jim-allchin-then-windows-chief-in-an-internal-email-in-january-2004-14″
title=”Jim Allchin, then Windows chief, in an internal email in January 2004.”
content=”The full email came to light during an antitrust case that went to trial in Iowa.”
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[slide
permalink=”what-people-underestimate-is-the-importance-of-good-or-bad-products-and-i-think-vista-was-a-less-good-product-for-microsoft-15″
title=””What people underestimate is the importance of good or bad products. And I think Vista was a less good product for Microsoft.””
content=””
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[slide
permalink=”charles-songhurst-gm-of-corporate-strategy-in-september-2009-16″
title=”Charles Songhurst, GM of corporate strategy, in September 2009.”
content=”He was talking to an audience of investors, contrasting Windows 7 with its predecessor. (Click here for a Word document transcript.) Perhaps the most surprising thing here is that it took so long for Microsoft to publicly admit it.”
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[slide
permalink=”yahoo-has-a-very-strong-consumer-brand-and-we-are-committed-to-build-on-the-yahoo-brand-17″
title=””Yahoo has a very strong consumer brand and we are committed to build on the Yahoo brand.””
content=””
image=”http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4b2a38290000000000a4b0ca”
caption=””
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[slide
permalink=”kevin-johnson-who-led-microsofts-online-business-in-february-2007-18″
title=”Kevin Johnson, who led Microsoft’s Online business, in February 2007.”
content=”The feeling wasn’t mutual, and a few months later, Microsoft abandoned its bid for Yahoo.”
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[slide
permalink=”hey-steve-just-because-you-broke-into-xeroxs-house-before-i-did-and-took-the-tv-doesnt-mean-i-cant-go-in-later-and-take-the-stereo-19″
title=””Hey, Steve, just because you broke into Xerox’s house before I did and took the TV doesn’t mean I can’t go in later and take the stereo.””
content=”Hint: this person was addressing Steve Jobs, not Steve Ballmer.”
image=”http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4ccf180ccadcbbe63b010000″
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[slide
permalink=”bill-gates-then-ceo-in-a-1989-edition-of-macweek-20″
title=”Bill Gates, then CEO, in a 1989 edition of MacWeek.”
content=”He was talking about Apple’s ‘look and feel’ lawsuit alleging that Windows copied the Mac. Gates’s point was that Apple had gotten a lot of ideas for the Mac GUI after touring Xerox PARC labs. So did Microsoft, as Paul Allen tells in his recent memoir, ‘Idea Man.'”
image=”http://static.businessinsider.com/image/ceb9b91489ab2e4a51b41d00″
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[slide
permalink=”thats-not-the-only-great-story-about-bill-gates-in-the-early-days-21″
title=”That’s not the only great story about Bill Gates in the early days.”
content=”10 Crazy Stories About Bill Gates From Paul Allen’s New Book→

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[/slideshow]