- I reviewed all of the muffin flavors I could find at Costco and ranked them from worst to best.
- The double-chocolate muffin was tasty but not as impressive as the others.
- Even though it was slightly undercooked, the blueberry muffin still blew me away.
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For years, I’ve yearned from afar, but I decided to try them all for the first time and rank them from worst to best.
I purchased and sampled them plain, at room temperature, and on the same day. Half were baked that morning, and the other half were from the day prior.
The first thing that struck me about these muffins was how incredibly heavy they were. Squat with a nearly ideal, almost equal top-to-bottom ratio, they felt remarkably dense.
Enticed by the generous, visible toppings, I dug in.
There was no discernible aroma once I opened the package, but a closer sniff revealed the scent of basic chocolate cake, which intensified when I cut the muffin open.
The center rise was slightly raw, which was likely a batch-specific problem since the blueberry muffins also made that day were even more undercooked.
I still appreciated that the chocolate chunks were embedded throughout the muffin and not just tossed on top for visual appeal. These pieces were great for taste and texture, adding moisture and dimension to the otherwise somewhat dry and flat-tasting chocolate base.
They also melted down nicely in each bite, like inverse frosting.
On its own, this muffin reminded me of a Dutch-cocoa cupcake, with a shy hint of chocolate that wouldn’t quite commit. It wasn’t rich like Devil’s food cake, but also wasn’t quite fudgy or moist.
It was the only muffin that had an immediately discernible scent as soon as I opened the package. It also had the highest tops of them all, with a firm, dry surface.
Slicing through it sounded like cutting a slightly wet sponge, which was a bit off-putting.
Eating this muffin continued to be a sensory experience. The seeds pleasantly popped in my mouth, cracking between my teeth even after I ate the base. If you like to savor your sweets, this flavor is the one for you.
A hybrid between a heavy pound cake and a white-almond wedding cake, it felt plush and tasted slightly nutty and sugary, with a sweetness that ramped up as I ate it.
This was definitely the easiest to eat in a large quantity since it was consistent from bite to bite, each of which was predictably good.
It had the shape and density of a muffin, the hit-you-over-the-head flavor of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and the texture of coffee cake, all topped with a crispy crumb streusel.
This muffin didn’t smell like much when I opened the container, so I didn’t expect it to pack such a sugary wallop.
Cutting into it felt deceptively dry, but I was soon greeted with ribbons of cinnamon layers swirling like a galaxy.
Once I bit into the muffin, the crumb topping remained crisp, but the dense center melted into a moist, airy mouthful.
I was first hit with the cinnamon and sugar, and I loved that the toppings weren’t excessive since the batter itself was a flavor bomb. It had an intense sweetness that settled and lingered.
Though, I tempered my excitement, because the surfaces looked dry, and unless I held them close to my face, these treats barely smelled like anything.
Plus I could feel through the knife that this muffin was outrageously moist.
Baked the same day as the double-chocolate muffins, this batch was also underdone — what I thought might be custard was actually raw batter.
But this muffin was excellent enough that I still ranked it first. Despite the appearance of the outer crumb and the flaw in its technical execution, it went above and beyond in nearly every way.
It was really well-balanced since the taste was subtly sweet, and the texture was dense and heavy without feeling like a pound cake. Plus the dry-looking top was actually quite soft, and the bottom edges easily melted away.
The cascades of blueberries were everything I’d hoped they’d be — naturally sweet and juicy.
Pairing this muffin with milk or coffee would also nicely bring out the vanilla finish.
Tasting them was easy. Not a single one needed additional toppings or adjustments to shine.
Despite there only being four muffin flavors to rank, this taste test was an excellent example of good curation. You don’t need to have a million varieties of something to excel in it — just a few exceptionally well-done options.
There was no worst flavor, and handing out the blue ribbon was a challenge since the options are diverse enough to make it subjective.
So I can say with certainty that there isn’t a wrong choice, and I can’t wait to try the seasonal flavors.