Do you get nervous and feel sick every time you’re asked to meet with your boss?
If so, there’s a good chance you fear your manager, which can take a toll on your well-being and your ability to succeed.
“Fear in the office can be a vicious cycle,” writes Brian de Haaff, CEO of Aha!, in a recent LinkedIn post. Sometimes your manager fears you and beats your confidence down to the point that you begin to fear them, he explains.
“Feeling sick at work is a surefire sign that something is terribly wrong,” he writes. “Every job has it’s own stressful moments, but no job is worth sacrificing your long-term health.”
If you feel uncomfortable around your boss — and even afraid — there are a few things you can do to conquer that fear:
1. Remember you have value.
“Your identity is not tied to your job,” writes de Haaff. “If you were to leave your role tomorrow, you would still have worth as an individual.”
This can be difficult to remember when you have a terrible boss, but it’s important to remind yourself of this on a regular basis.
“We often fear bad managers because they threaten our livelihoods, our ability to pay rent, buy what we need, and advance our careers,” he says. “Tell yourself that you did these things before and will again whether or not you ever see your boss again.”
2. Remind yourself that you deserve to be treated with respect.
“Throughout your career, you will likely meet office bullies who love to form cliques, mock others, and manipulate good people without helping them succeed,” says de Haaff. “It hurts more when it’s your boss.”
The key, he explains, is to continue to act with dignity. “You can’t control how other people act — but you can control your own response. You can calmly explain to any peer or boss that you can handle feedback but expect it to be shared with dignity.”
We want to know your most pressing questions related to your career or job search! Tweet Careers editor Jacquelyn Smith @JacquelynVSmith or email her at jsmith[at]businessinsider[dot]com, and we’ll do our best to answer them.
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