Photo: Dean812 via Flickr
Here’s one sign Wall Street won’t get crushed by the recent regulation attacks.The people on Wall Street are getting stronger, physically and mentally. From an informal survey of sources, we’ve learned that there’s a bit of a health craze happening on Wall Street.
People are cleansing with juices and spending more hours at the gym to get in fighting shape.
Of course, vices call. But the drugs that Wall Streeters do use regularly are often performance-enhancing drugs. Rather than brain-eating drugs like heroin and ecstasy, Wall Street turns to drugs that will make them operate at 150%.
Out of our list of the 11 most popular drugs on Wall Street, there are only 3 drugs that are considered “depressants,” (we included marijuana in that, although technically, it’s a stimulant). Most of them purport to make you sharper, smarter, and in some cases, better looking (at least in your own opinion).
Type of drug: 3-hydroxy benzodiazepine
Prescribed for: Anxiety (short term)
Wall Street use: To calm, to counter-act and come down from uppers taken during the day, for courage
Effects: Lorazepam dissolves on your tongue and delivers a fast calm-down effect, kind of like a shot of alcohol without the loss of judgment and coordination.
When to take: Before a big meeting, or after a long day instead of alcohol. It would also work well before you appear in your after you get caught insider trading.
Type of drug: Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor
Prescribed for: Anxiety (long term), depression
Wall Street use: For anxiety, depression, working too hard, hating your job (studies show an improvement of the subjective quality of life at work).
Effects: If it works, greater happiness. If you're lucky, weight loss.
When to take: Everyday as prescribed, otherwise it doesn't work.
Type of drug: Psychoactive
Prescribed for: Pain, loss of hunger, anxiety (only in 16 states: California, Colorado, etc)
Wall Street use: To chill, laugh, beat boredom of not killing it.
Effects: Judgment loss, short-term memory loss, trouble with thinking and learning. Increased heart rate.
When to take: At the end of a long day, on the weekend. On Nantucket for 4th of July weekend.
Type of drug: statin
Prescribed for: Lowering cholesterol
Wall Street use: For older men, to maintain 18 hour work days at age 50, and eat well. Or for younger men, for whom bad cholesterol runs in the family.
Effects: Stabilizes plaque and prevents strokes
When to take: Every day, as prescribed.
Type of drug: Analeptic
Prescribed for: Narcolepsy (military soldiers and air force pilots who need to stay awake at night are rumoured to use it).
Wall Street use: Concentration, hangover cure
Effects: Feeling very awake, cognitive enhancing, improves memory in areas such as digit span, digit manipulation and pattern recognition.
When to take: In the morning after a long night. Studying for your Series 7, Series 63, CFA, etc.
Type of drug: A psychostimulant and dopamine reuptake inhibitor and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor
Prescribed for: ADHD
Wall Street use: Concentration, improved performance, hangover cure.
Effects: Increases heart beat, increases the amount of dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain. Weightloss. Directly affects the mesolimbic reward pathway in the brain. Similar to cocaine.
When to take: Not after 3 pm or you'll be up all night. The average half life is 10 hours in adults.
UH OH: There's reportedly a shortage of Adderrall right now.
Type of drug: Psychostimulant
Prescribed for: ADD
Wall Street use: Performance enhancing, improving focus, attention, alertness, and for combating fatigue.
Effects: Increases the levels of dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain through reuptake inhibition of the monoamine transporters. Works by increasing the activity of the central nervous system.
When to take: When you need drugs to get you on your A-game.
Type of drug: Serotonin--norepinephrine--dopamine reuptake inhibitor
Prescribed for: It is not prescribed. It is illegal.
Wall Street use: To improve a night out.
Effects: Like Adderall, it affects the mesolimbic reward pathway. It increases alertness, feelings of well-being and euphoria, energy and motor activity, feelings of competence and sexuality.
When to take: At night on the weekends, but only when you have absolutely no chance of getting caught with it.
Type of drug: Psychoactive stimulant
Prescribed for: Apnea in premature newborns
Wall Street use: Daily stimulant, appetite suppressant, work aid
Effects: Temporarily wards off drowsiness, restores alertness, stimulates awareness, and elevates your mood.
When to take: In the morning, at lunch, after dinner ... Whenever!
Type of drug: Psychoactive
Prescribed for: Maybe in Ireland.
Wall Street use: Intoxication, courage.
Effects: The body metabolizes alcohol as an energy-providing nutrient. It then has depressive effects on the central nervous system including relaxation, impaired sensory and motor function, slowed cognition, and stupefaction. In the morning, dehydration. After years of use, liver and brain damage.
When to take: At night, on celebratory occasions.
Type of drug: cGMP-specific phosphodiesterase type 5 inhibitor
Prescribed for: Erectile dysfunction
Wall Street use: For erectile dysfunction, to improve sexual performance, to get it up after an Adderall-filled day or cocaine-filled night, to counteract the side effects of hair-loss drugs.
Effects: Ability to sustain a satisfactory erection, improved sexual performance, increased libido.
When to take: Before sex.
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