A creepy Tom Hiddleston stars in a bizarre Chinese advert where he serves the viewer an appalling-looking breakfast of raw vegetables, fruit, and an egg

WeiboWould you care for an egg, madame?
  • Tom Hiddleston stars in a bizarre Chinese advert for Centrum multivitamins that puts you in the shoes of his beloved.
  • The “Loki” actor shared the advert on his Weibo page, saying: “Here’s something special for you at breakfast time. Wishing all my friends in China a great start to their day!”
  • The ad – which shows the actor serving you an abominable plate of raw fruit, vegetables, and a fried egg before quickly leaving – is a little jarring for western viewers.
  • According to Inkstone, though, there’s a number of reasons why it may work for a Chinese audience.

Do you dream of waking up to Tom Hiddleston making you breakfast in the morning?

Picture this: his shaggy, overgrown locks dangle over a frying pan as you stagger towards the kitchen bleary-eyed.

He turns around and offers you a plate of … raw vegetables. All arranged in colour-coded lines with … a heart-shaped fried egg on top.

This oddly specific, largely disturbing dream is now a reality thanks to Centrum’s China branch.

The “Loki” star shared an advert for the multivitamin brand on his Weibo page, and it’s a little jarring for western viewers, to say the least.

Here’s how it goes down.

You arise from your slumber in a room that’s surely too bright to get any kind of meaningful sleep in, but stretch out vivaciously, safe in the knowledge that Tom Hiddleston is your spouse, or partner, or father, or uncle – you don’t really find out which.

Tom Hiddleston Chinese weibo adWeiboGood morning, strange world.

You wander downstairs to find the toe-tapping, apron-wearing actor putting the finishing touches to your breakfast.

“I finished early so thought I’d pop back and make you breakfast,” he says, handing you a plate of what seems to be raw vegetables with a single, heart-shaped egg on top.

There are also pomegranate seeds and blackberries, as if this plate wasn’t already enough of a hot-cold car crash.

Tom Hiddleston Centrum adWeiboWhat is this abomination?

What job could possibly release its employees early enough to be back home again in time for breakfast? Well, Hiddleston does have history working as a “Night Manager.”

“Pepper on top, right?” he says, pointing at your plate of literal insanity, which now has pepper on it.

Fortuitously, Hiddleston then remembers the tub of Centrum multivitamins that’s right next to him on the table, and breaks into some Mandarin for the most important line: “Oh, and here’s your Centrum.”

Tom Hiddleston Centrum adWeiboDon’t forget your Centrum, honey.

A moment of deep, penetrating eye contact with Hiddleston passes – presumably he’s making sure you’re eating the Centrum. “You look great,” he says, finally, in a way that can only be described as mildly threatening.

As quickly as he arrived into your life, Hiddleston is preparing to leave again, putting on his jacket.

“I’ll probably be a bit busy for the next few weeks,” he tells you.

“But I’ll make it up to you soon, I promise,” he adds with an inflexion that can be read as either deeply sexual or extremely murderous.

Your hands reach up and straighten his lapels – from the angle shown, you must be around four-foot tall.

Tom Hiddleston Centrum adWeiboLuckily you can just about reach his collar to straighten it.

With a final, knowing glance over his shoulder at you, Hiddleston leaves the house – you can finally make your escape.

You can watch the full video below.

While the ad certainly seems bizarre, there are actually a number of reasons why it may perform well with a Chinese audience,Inkstone News (a platform owned by South China Morning Post) explains.

Firstly, the video is in vertical – perfect for mobile viewing, which around 800 million Chinese people make use of.

Secondly, it could be popular because he cooks in it, Kineta Hung, an expert on Chinese advertising at Hong Kong Baptist University, told Inkstone.

“Especially in the US, people look for masculine men who are strong and hero-like,” Hung said.

“Chinese women look for a much more gentle version of masculinity, someone who would help in the household, especially cooking.”

Thirdly, the weird, heart-shaped egg and colour-coordinated vegetables are perfect fodder for social media. Chinese shopping sites sell fried egg moulds of all kinds, Inkstone notes.

Finally, Hiddleston’s Mandarin is actually pretty good. Inkstone says 90% of his speaking tones were done correctly.

“Foreigners who speak Chinese are greatly appreciated by people in the country, who often regard it as a tribute to Chinese culture,” Viola Zhou of Inkstone writes.

Though he may only have around 600,000 Weibo followers at current, Hiddleston could carve out a lucrative chunk of Chinese advertising profit if he continues at his current trajectory. Let’s just hope he stops cooking.

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