The House Of God Where New Jersey's Dirty Money Got Washed

house bedford synagogue

L. Ron Hubbard famously (supposedly) said the way to make a million dollars is to start a religion. But like so many lurcrative frauds before it, the immense corruption scandal that upended New Jersey politics yesterday is a powerful reminder that piggybacking on an old religion works even better.

Start a synagogue like Congregation Sheves Achim, pictured above courtesy The Jewish Channel, and you don’t even need a congregation to get into the lucrative business of racketeering and money laundering!

At least 96 other nonprofits are registered to the address of Sheves Achim, where Rabbi Mordechai Fish laundered over half a million dollars for the FBI, taking a pretty sweet 15% cut for his holiness. A child who answered the phone at the house was reportedly unaware it was a house of God, and The Jewish Channel was apparently too polite to ask whether he’d found any wads of cash stuffed into any of his Apple Jacks boxes.

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