Springsteen Angry About Suit Filed By Springsteen And 9 Other Wild Legal Stories Of The Week

Bruce Springsteen Angry (AP)

It’s that time of the week again!

Here’s a round-up of this week’s strangest/weirdest/wildest stories.

As always, some are serious cases with amusing twists, while others are ridiculous, embarrassing, tragic, fraudulent or just, well, weird. 

All are appearing on the site for the first time — they just seem deserving of a collective, end-of-the-week eyebrow raise. 

Included are a woman who sued Oprah for implanting wires in her head and a stripper who sued her employer after she drank too much on the job.


Oprah implanted sensors in me and I want $50 billion.

Oprah, President George W. Bush and former First Lady Laura Bush can breath a sigh of relief -- if they ever knew this lawsuit existed.

A judge in West Virginia threw out a complaint against the three and three local physicians that claimed they had conspired to implant a camera adn sensors into her for some sort of reincarnation purpose.

Score one for the legal community -- the woman was representing herself, so at least no lawyer agreed to file this one.

See the original report from the West Virginia Record here.

Even Robbers Have Feelings

A police officer in San Diego arrested a man who had called the cops because he had been punched in the face.

Why? Well, he had been punched in the face because he was trying to rob an 83-year-old woman at a trolley station.

Legal juice has the story here.

The Right to Bear Cell Phone Cameras

A lawyer is suing the Boston police after he wrongfully arrested.

One does wonder why the police thought they could arrest him. All he did was take cell phone video of them arresting someone else in public -- and allegedly using force to do so.

The case against the man was of course dismissed, so his lawsuit can't claim too much as far as damages. He's suing the department for failing to properly train its employees.

The National Law Journal has a full report here.

This one should be filed under novel, as it definitely is not funny.

A woman whose uncle distributed pornographic pictures of her as a child -- pictures that became known as 'the Misty series' and were widely distributed on the Web -- is has filed suit demanding that everyone convicted of possession of her picture pay her damages. She's making a total claim of $3.4 million.

The New York Times has a full report, including the debate over the propriety of such suits, here.

All in the name of work

In 2007, a stripper got in a wreck on her way home from her place of employment, The Furnace.

This week a jury awarded her $100,000 from The Furnace. The now-former stripper, Patsy Hamaker, claimed the strip club disregarded its own safety rules by allowing her to get drunk.

The Birmingham News has a full report here. Overlawyered's coverage is here.

It Doesn't Pay To Impersonate Paul Simon

If you are going to try to impersonate a celebrity and remove money from their account, choose one you look like.

A man walked into a Manhattan bank and tried to take $4,300 out of Paul Simon's account. The clerk became suspicious -- the man before her was 54 years old and 6-foot-1; Paul Simon is 68 and five-foot-3.

He ran from the bank when the clerk asked for identification, but was arrested a short time later.

The NY Post has the full story here.

A 'sweat-lodge' guru has been charged with manslaughter for the death of three people who attended his 'Spiritual Warrior' program near Sedona Arizona.

Attendees of the program spent up to two hours in a dome-like structure covered with tarps and blankets; inside were hot rocks and water to create steam.

The guru, James Ray, said it was a terrible accident; a former employee said in December that the outside of the tent was like a 'MASH unit' when people came out. Melinda Martin said bodies were everywhere, but that James looked like 'a million bucks' and was 'completely oblivious to the pandemonium.'

James appeared on Oprah in 2007.

CNN has full coverage here.

The Boss Gets Bitter

Bruce Springsteen sued small New York City club for playing his music without the proper ASCAP* licence.

Except he had no idea he was doing it, and only found out when the suit hit the press, complete with commentary about the 'voice of the working class' suing a bar.

ASCAP added his name to the suit without his knowledge, Springsteen said. When he found out, he demanded he be removed. It's so hard being a celebrity!

Gothamist has the full story here.

*ASCAP is the association that provided relatively inexpensive licenses to businesses that allows them to play music. Gothamist also has a link to ASCAP executives, should you want more information.

Have Hair, Will Travel

A police officer noticed a woman driving down the Long Island Expressway with a female friend.

The officer found it strange that the friend, a long-haired, high-cheek-boned lady, was wearing a visor and sunglasses on a cloudy day.

He found it even more strange once he discovered the lady was a mannequin that the driver brought along so she could take the HOV lane. The driver was, not surprisingly, issued a $135 fine and two points on her licence.

Newsday's coverage (subscription required) is here. Gothamist has a humorous take here -- our favourite line suggests the mannequin is a lot of fun 'once you get a few drinks in her or introduce her to Andrew McCarthy.'

Beaten for Burping?

A man claims he was beaten in his jail cell after his drunk driving arrest because the Roanoke, Virginia officers became annoyed with his excessive burping.

The beating allegedly included being forced to his knees and repeatedly struck and being slammed onto a metal bunk. Strangely, all his clothes were removed, other than his boxer shorts. He was treated at the local hospital.

Whether that is worth $3 million will be up to jury to decide.

Courthouse News has the full story and the complaint here.

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