A lot of gamers love Nintendo, and go to great lengths to show allegiance to the company, whether that means dressing up as their favourite characters or camping out overnight (or perhaps a week) for the newest console.
That doesn’t mean, however, that they’re hardcore fanboys. It takes more than just owning every system and Mario game to join this elite group of players. Platinum Club Nintendo status? No big deal. Shigeru Miyamoto’s autograph? Amateur punk stuff.
No, you’ll need to go that extra mile to become a diehard super fan, or at the very least, have smart business sense and the appreciation for great music.
On that note, you’re a hardcore Nintendo fanboy if…
You own an ocarina and know how to use it
Now you can play along with Link. Sweet.
Unless you’re some kind of musical historian, there’s only one reason you have an ocarina. OK, two reasons. First, you love The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, and second, the Rod of Seasons, Harp of Ages and Minish Cap don’t exist, so you’ll settle for this strange looking wind instrument. One point if you coughed up the dough to nab one of these ceramic bad boys. Two points if you also have a book of sheet music to go with it. Three points if you know how to play and do so while sitting in a forest.
Get your ocarina right here.
You own company stock
The best part? You get paid in gold coins. Maybe.
Apple? Google? Trash. No, you love Nintendo so much you own a piece of the company. To you, NTDOY isn’t some weird acronym. It’s an investment that’ll serve as the key to your retirement in the gated community of Hyrule, or something like that.
[Editor’s Note: Please consult a professional before playing the stock market.]
You have a real Nintendo themed tattoo
Still better than a tribal tattoo.
It takes a lot of guts (and alcohol) to walk into a joint and pay a hairy dude with a nipple piercing to etch Kirby into your butt. Some people get tattoos of loved ones, others barbed wire. You have the tri force on one arm and never hesitate to show that bad boy off.
You cry during trailers
Finally, after all these years. [sniff]
Everyone loves video game trailers. You, on the other hand, get so worked up tears cascade down your cheeks like a waterfall. The mere sight of a new Zelda or Kid Icarus propels you to a level of joy normally reserved for parents whose son or daughter came home from Iraq. Games don’t make people cry? Says who?
You visited Nintendo’s Japanese headquarters, but you don’t live anywhere close to Japan
Image of building withheld to protect Nintendo.
We’d like to think that the highlight of your Japanese vacation involved shopping in Tokyo or taking in the gorgeous countryside, and not flying 10 hours or more to stand in front of Nintendo’s corporate HQ in Kyoto. Even worse if you expected to call down Miyamoto for lunch to, you know, pick his brain.
[Editor’s Note: We own two ocarinas and the sheet music.]