Dozens of sites advertise beautiful, foreign brides, and plenty draw scepticism. How can all those women possibly be so beautiful? Are they just out to scam lonely American men?An employee of the website RussianLoveMatch.com recently did a Reddit Ask Me Anything to clear up questions people have about the service.
We talked to the site and they confirmed the Reddit user is really an employee. She talks about how to avoid scams, why the women are so beautiful and how you can meet one.
The photos featured are real women with profiles on the site.
A: We have women between the ages of 18 through late 50's. Some are indeed really hot. Circumstance? Who knows. Judging from their photos and videos, they're doing OK. Not rich, but not digging potatoes out of the frozen tundra.
A: To ensure the women are who they say they are, we review their photo IDs (passports, licenses) and make a copy for our records. This generally gets rid of identity thieves, celebrity photos, and Boris pretending to be Natasha. That and we have live video streaming, so men can see the women themselves.
The women must also record a submit a validation video in which they state they are using the service of their own free will, that they will not accept money to participate on the site, and that they will not request money or gifts from our members.
A: Most women join the site because they're curious or adventurous, want to expand their dating pool, etc. The women aren't clamoring to leave Russia like many Westerners think. In fact, getting a Visa and moving thousands of miles away from their home is pretty gruelling, as you can imagine.
Q: As someone who is deeply attracted to European women, what are my best options to fulfil this desire?
A: I'd tell you to take a look at the profiles (we have nearly 10,000 women), message a few ladies who appeal to you, be polite and respectable at all times, and take it from there. Also, have realistic expectations.
A: No. If I recall, the man in that movie ordered the woman without meeting her first, which isn't realistic. Also, he called customer service in one scene and got a voicemail. We're available 24/7 to meet all your Russian bride needs.
Q: This was always my backup plan, but now all I hear about is how these girls stay until they get full citizenship after a few years and then take off on the guy.
A: I hear success stories all the time. Many couples email us their pictures and stories for the testimonials page. Most of the horror stories I heard came from our customer service department about men who literally expected to buy a bride and were mad when a woman didn't do what they wanted (meet on command, chat on command, marry on command.)
Q: I've heard claims that sometimes you can marry a bride, she claims abuse after she gets citizenship, and then she leaves you. Is this true?
A: The success rate is impossible to calculate because we don't keep tabs on members or the status of their relationships.
The men vary, of course. Some are sexist and into exotic women, but most are normal guys who are intrigued by the idea of meeting women from overseas and opening up their dating pool.
Q: These women on the site claim to be 18 and 19 year old engineers, and they supposedly look like that?
Q: I'm pretty sceptical about that one. A girl like that could easily be a professional model. You have to wonder how legitimate this site actually is.
A: This is a totally valid concern. Keep in mind though, that they're all made up to look their absolute best and those are professional photos the introduction agencies (where women go to use computer) have helped set up. Also, the 'most popular = hottest' women appear on the site first. We have plenty of 'average looking' women as well.
Q: Are their weights and heights a little embellished? A woman who is 5 feet and 8 inches should not weigh 110 lbs..
A: I suspect they shave a few pounds off their stated weights, like women tend to do. A lot of guys who go after foreign women make a big thing about weight and 'fat Western women' so maybe that has something to do with it?
Q: Do you set the women up with professional photographers? Because mostly all of these photos aren't exactly mirror-shots like ok OKCupid.
A: The introduction agencies (where ladies go to use computers) set them up at a discount, sometimes free. There are a network of agencies in Ukraine, Russia where women go to chat with men online, meet new people, etc.
Q: So you are saying these women are looking for partners outside of Russia/Ukraine in order to go out of their own country and start living/get married to whomever they've met online?
A: The women are open to meeting men from other countries and possibly marrying one, but by joining the site they aren't GUARANTEEING they will marry a foreign man, anymore than a woman on Match.com will guarantee she'll marry someone from that site. Hot Russian Brides is a niche dating site. The woman aren't literally for sale and men can't buy a wife.
Q: Some of the women on there are gorgeous. I can't imagine most guys being able to hold on to some of these girls once they actually get them over to the U.S. Reading about this industry, I have heard something similar where many girls just do this to get married and fake it for a year or two and then divorce and stay in the US, having planned it the entire time. Do you think there is any truth to this?
Q: You say you check the women, but wouldn't this be an ideal site for the KGB (you may say they don't exist anymore but we all know that they do)? Does that issue ever even come up?
Q: So if you educate the men, and a lot of these women don't speak English, can you translate for the couples as well?
A: Translation is included with the cost of membership. There are translators at the agencies who help women communicate if they need assistance with emails and what not. Some women are fluent, others not, and many speak other languages besides English.
A: The man generally flies over because the women have less money and they have to apply for a tourist Visa that can be a pain to get. Most Westerners don't need one to travel to Ukraine, where most of our women are from. However, a lot of men are 'Keyboard Romeos' in that they never travel to see women in person. The women know this so they may be a bit sceptical until someone actually visits.
Q: Is it ever the case (to your knowledge) that the man moves to Ukraine or Russia to live with her?
A: It's not required, but they like to do it. The agencies often set up cheap, and sometimes free, photography sessions and the women want to look their absolute best on the site. I've never been to Eastern Europe and I'm no culture expert, but I've heard several times that looking good is extremely important to Russian women. I recently read a couple of articles (forget the site) where Ukrainian officials gave female airport employees makeovers so they would represent the country well for Euro 2012. They're expected to look good.
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