We’re firmly in the age of tabloid mania, and it comes down to simple maths:
Real, productive stars like George Clooney, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt just don’t produce enough headlines to sustain scores of websites, TV shows and magazines.
They’re constantly being snapped and quoted, but less frequently being paid to do any actual acting, singing or writing.
And they keep the celeb news cycle humming along while the big names are off doing their jobs.
Paris Hilton was the original -- back when she reigned, people still bothered to ask why people were famous for being famous.
Then came the Kardashians, whose formula was simple multiplication: Kim's boring you today? Then check out what Kourtney or Khloe or Kris or Kylie or Kendall is doing.
Remember the chaos surrounding Anna Nicole Smith's death? Larry Birkhead won the paternity fight there -- and he's been available to comment on such matters (or anything) ever since. Just this weekend he chatted with TMZ about Justin Bieber's lawsuit.
A tattoo reality show wasn't enough for Kat Von D. First she blabbed about being in love with Jesse James, then she walked off an interview over a Jesse James question, then she told anyone who'd listen that he cheated on her repeatedly. Kat: if it seems like these stunts aren't landing, it's because nobody cares about Jesse James.
If Leann Rimes had all the time she's spent being photographed braless and in bikinis back, she'd probably have 10 more albums.
Sure, Lindsay Lohan's in the news all the time, but it's her dad, Michael, who's truly an Olympic famewhore.
Tila Tequila alternates between putting in her two cents on every scandal and just getting naked. For example, in November: she tweeted pics of herself in boxing gloves and not much else -- and commented on the Demi Moore/Ashton Kutcher divorce.
We're all trying to ignore Courtney Stodden, the child bride who likes executing everyday activities in barely-there outfits. But like a stubborn stain, she's not going to be easy to get rid of.
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