It’s only the fourth day of the new year, but if you’ve already broken your New Year’s resolutions, John Oliver has some sage advice. And if you haven’t failed yet, “Statistically, you are about to,” Oliver said.
According to Oliver, New Year’s resolutions are “the exact middle ground between lying to yourself and lying to other people.” He took to YouTube for another web exclusive
for “Last Week Tonight” to talk about revising resolutions once you’ve failed to keep them.
“The main problem with resolutions is that we set our expectations way too high,” Oliver said.
For instance, many people say they want to exercise more in the new year. So if someone is struggling with hitting the gym, Oliver’s advice is to lower the standards about what constitutes exercise to something that just increases the heart rate.
“Instead of jogging, simply try waking up late for work or taking a pregnancy test,” he said. “That way, you haven’t failed to keep your New Year’s resolution, you’ve just succeeded in a different way.”
If all else fails, Oliver’s advice is to set unachievable goals, so you can’t feel bad once you inevitably fail.
“Deep down, we all know that the key to a successful resolution is not hard work and dedication,” he said. “It’s managing disappointment, and that’s it.”
“Last Week Tonight” will return February 14.
Watch the video below:
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