6 kinds of jeans we never want to see on a grown man again

The jeans we’re about to present are online for sale, so we’re assuming some men are buying them.

But that doesn’t mean that they should.

We’ve consistently seen some offensive pairs out on the Street, running wild with impunity, so with the help of stylist Jessica Cadmus, of the Wardrobe Whisperer, Business Insider is setting down some super easy guidelines.

“Jeans are the cornerstone of most men’s casual wardrobe. They are extremely versatile, travel well, shrink to fit, and come in myriad colours and washes. They are rugged, cool, and often sexy.”

“However, it is still incumbent upon the wearer to select wisely because unfortunately there exist an abundance of ill options,” Cadmus said.

And we’re about to show you a few of the ill-est.

Note: We didn’t even get into non-pant denim. Perhaps next time.

The awkward cut.

Barneys calls these 'cropped.' We consider them a taper tantrum.

It also creates what our Elena Holodny calls 'the old man sagging effect.'

Studded jeans.

Is Blink182 having a reunion tour?

Huge pockets.

It's unclear how jeans with huge pockets managed to stay in some realm of acceptable fashion. They're not flattering. Wear things that are flattering.

Destroyed jeans.

This should go without saying but your jeans should look like you bought them, not rescued them.

Wranglers, 'dad jeans,' cargo jeans.

A few things about these. Cargo pants are terrible, and jean form is their most insidious form.

Also, we should point out that you can't actually enlarge this image on Wal-Marts website, probably because... who would want to?

Really aggressive colours.

Standard colours are fine, but stray too much out of the box and you may find yourself looking like a Reno, Nevada club-owner circa 1992.

That's not the look you want.

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