Photo: Flickr/Travis Hornung
Think your co-workers are weird?These guys have got you beat. More than 300 people answered the call on a hilarious Reddit feed that asks about the weirdest thing commenters have seen a co-worker do.
The responses run the gamut, from eating pizza sauce right out of the restaurant trough to indulging in bodily functions in their cubicle.
What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever seen a co-worker do?
'I worked at a pizza place for a while. Once, I dropped by the refrigerator to grab something. When I got to the fridge, I saw one of my fellow employees through the porthole window. He was sitting on the ground with a big bucket, scooping sauce with his bare hands into his mouth. I nearly vomited.'
'A few years ago I was working as a summer intern at a company. The interns were all put in sort of one long row of desks, sort of half cubicles but we could see all the way down the row.
Well there was this one quite attractive female intern that sat 3 or 4 desks down from me. We said hi a few times but she worked with a different group so I didn't know her very well. One day I got back to my desk, sat down and happened to glance over there.
She was the only other person in the area, and she must have thought she was alone, because she had her hand down the back of her pants and appeared to be scratching or massaging her anus. She was half turned away from me so she didn't see me looking. She pulled her hand back out, sniffed her middle finger, and then licked it.'
I guess for some guys that would have been pretty hot, but it pretty much just repulsed me.'
'I'm the IT director for a group of auto dealerships and my boss has monitoring software on every machine we use. This helps him exert authority, but the truth is he has no idea how to monitor the staggering amount of information that comes in. Naturally, that falls to me. Internet histories, right down to your Google search history, all end up visible to me eventually, and let's just say that while I understand luxury car sales is a boring gig but...Jesus.
A lot of normal stuff. ESPN, youtube, sports blogs, ordering food online. Then an equally large amount of highly disturbing stuff. Furry porn, browsing for dildos (at work? Really?), the google search phrase 'Are black warts near my crotch herpes?', a married male salesman browsing other men's profiles on OkCupid it goes on and on and on.
The worst part is, it's kind of like being a porn store clerk. The nature of your job exposes you to deeply personal (and disgusting) information about people you'd rather regard as strangers.'
'Worked at a warehouse for a short bit. One day 'Mike' asks the new coworker girl (super cute, everyone fell for her at some point) out. She turns him down.
Fast forward a few minutes and when he thinks he's alone in the back aisle, I observe him cursing himself...he then proceeded to start punching himself (really fucking hard) in the side of the head. Turns out it was good I happened to be there as he wound up knocking himself unconscious...good times!'
'Saw a secretary talking on the phone. After the end of the call (I'm assuming), she stared at the phone quizzically for a moment, then gave it an aprehensive lick, as if she expected her tongue to stick like in that christmas movie.'
'One of my cubicle walls has a space where the corners connect (this is right behind my monitor so I am constantly looking in that direction) and I have a view of the person sitting infront of me. The view faces their back and somehow they have never noticed that I could see them.
Our cubicles have a sliding door on them that people use sometimes for 'privacy' (usually if they are on the phone or something, but it is pretty useless since theres obviously no roof on the cubicles and it does little to block out noise)
So this guy closes his door and I don't hear him on the phone so I get curious and angle myself so I can take a look at his monitor. I notice he is looking at scat porn and immediately want to puke. Then I notice that his hand is down his pants. He was masturbating in his cubicle!'
'I have a co-worker that hides cans of chef boyardee at his desk. every day he'll pop a can open, and eat it right out of the can. once he's finished with his 'meal' he'll clean his hands and shoes with Windex.'
'My boss will pop his blackheads and eat them, he also eats his earwax and his boogers. When he starts it's usually a 10 to fifteen minute ordeal he will go through all three disgusting steps and then he uses hand sanitizer I'm not sure what the point of that is. We share an office so I'm exposed to it on a regular basis, I could go into more detail if needed.'
'In a big department store, I work on the floor that sells women's nightwear and lingerie. So we're all tidying up after the store closed and this new kid, a christmas temp who was a bit weird, was tidying one of the underwear tables. The floor manager was walking past and noticed that he was sniffing one of the knickers.
So she asked him 'Herp, what are you doing?'
To which he replied 'oh... sorry, Derp. I was just checking if they'd been worn'
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