Ex-Girlfriend Says Alleged Insider Trader Was “Kind-Hearted” And “Meticulous”

Garrett Bauer appearing in court today.

The wealth that her then-boyfriend, trader Garrett Bauer, possessed never added up, says one of his ex-girlfriends.Bauer was arrested for insider trading Wednesday and charged with securities fraud. He and his alleged accomplices, Matt Kluger, an M&A lawyer, and a “middleman” are accused of profitting off of trades on information about mergers that Kluger’s law firm, Wilson Sonsini, was working on.

“I’m shocked to be reading this,” one of Bauer’s ex-girlfriends told Clusterstock about the charges against her ex-boyfriend. He’s the “salt of the earth,” and so “kind-hearted.” 

We haven’t verified any of her anecdotes about Bauer*, but the words she uses to describe him are “serious,” and “super generous with his time and money.” She also described him as “meticulous,” a “clean freak,” and very “quirky.” 

“He looks like Paul McCartney,” she says, and acts like “Woody Allen.”

But “one plus one never quite equalled two.”

They would say “oh he must have made a lot of money during the dot-come bubble,” or something to explain how friends made their money.

One of his friends, according to her, included trader Doug Madaio.

Another wealthy Wall Streeter who is somewhat connected to Bauer is Doug Lebda, the founder of Lending Tree. Lebda is the previous owner of Bauer’s $6.65 million penthouse.

Despite having “$20 million in the bank,” two of Bauer’s favourite places to eat were the chains Houlihan’s and McDonald’s, says his ex. He would splurge after working out like a “gangbuster” on his exercise bike by eating “whatever he wanted.”

As an example of his quirky behaviour, she told us that “one time, he noticed that McDonald’s wasn’t making their Chocolate Chip cookies right.”

“Somehow he figured out that the oven wasn’t calibrated right, so he called the manager.” He was right; the oven was off-kilter. “They fixed it.” 

The evidence of insider trading the FBI has against Bauer and Kluger seems pretty strong. Investigators appear to have records of phone calls that contain Bauer and Kluger divulging incriminating information about their scheme. For example, Bauer admits doing something “wrong.” 

“It sounds like he might go to jail…” she said. “He won’t take this well.”

She spoke fondly of their time together (several months). “He offered to buy plane tickets; he offered the world.”

It was clear that he “wanted to fall in love,” she says, but ultimately their relationship fizzled, in part because of timing and also because “he was obsessed with J Date.”

Click here to see 12 hilariously incriminating quotes from the FBI’s case against Bauer and Matt Kluger >

*We’ve made efforts to contact Bauer for a comment, but we haven’t found any contact details for him yet. His Facebook profile is set to private and there is no record of him anywhere else. If Bauer or anyone has any other information, you know where to find us.