Discovery Will Have You Know Reality TV Hasn't Reached Maximum Insanity Yet -- Check Out These 8 Shows In Development

gypsy brides

The fall reality lineup from Discovery Channel, Animal Planet and TLC makes “Jersey Shore” look like serious anthropological research.

Discovery Communications, which owns the three channels, had their programming upfront today (the big network upfronts, which we’ll be covering, take place in May).

And Discovery, which dominates much of the reality genre — think “Deadliest Catch,” “Dirty Jobs” and “Say Yes to the Dress” — are looking to crazy things up.

'How were five people shot by their dogs since 1990?' is literally the first mystery on their to-solve list.

Because, you know, they need to leave room for 'Big Fat Gypsy' spinoffs set in other lands. Also, we were unaware that it's still OK to say 'gypsy.'

This one's just going to be a special, not a series -- but you know Christmas trees. There's bound to be drama.

Set at the Atlanta salon 'Bridals by Lori,' which already has its own 'Say Yes' franchise, this series promises both shopping and fitting shenanigans.

Our first reaction, too, was that this is a show about a tattoo parlor for furless animals. Alas, it's a salon that specialises in 'photorealistic wildlife tattoos.'

A pair of Brooklyn-born (read: tough-talkin') exterminators take on New York City vermin. Probably not good for viewing up to 12 hours before or after eating.

Animal Planet wants to welcome you to 'the wild sport of noodling,' which involves people trying to catch catfish with their bare hands -- and feet. Wait, feet?

The Animal Planet miniseries will pit YouTube clips of puppies against YouTube clips of babies. We don't really know what the 'pitting' involves.

Now check out some bizarre royal-wedding paraphernalia.

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