Dating Advice From The Hindu On How To Snag A Banker Before V Day

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Photo: KCRA

So this popped up in my news feed this morning.It’s from the newspaper The Hindu’s advice column. The problem at hand: “You accidentally dumped your boyfriend last week and now realise you’re dateless for Valentines.”

The advice:

“Gather your entourage and start hitting the party circuit. Make sure you pick some ugly friends, though. Even if that means you need to sabotage their outfits or makeup. A good tip is taking the girls out for burgers (with extra onions) just before you start clubbing. Sportsmanship is for sweaty people. In the dating game, all is fair in love and war. And this is war.

“When a hot man approaches, lower your voice and talk in breathy sentences. Make sure you don’t say anything too intelligent — brains frighten the mushy men. So if he’s a banker, say something appropriate like, “So (giggle) tell me… like, which of the Lehman brothers, like, caused the economic thingamajig?”

A better idea: Don’t do that, and read a newspaper. People at the bar will be like, why are you reading a paper from 3 years ago? And then you’re IN!

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