Reuters/Andrew KellyNo matter how many times embarrassing Wall Street emails, conversations, or tirades get made public, it never seems to stop.
Even the most respected Wall Streeters can put their foot in their mouths from time to time at events such as investor days or panels at colleges and universities.
So we’ve decided to compile a rundown of Wall Street’s most embarrassing words they probably wish were never made public.
'If anyone at Cerberus has his picture in the paper and a picture of his apartment, we will do more than fire that person. We will kill him. The jail sentence will be worth it,' Cerberus's Stephen Feinberg told shareholders back in 2007.
Paul Tudor Jones speaking on a panel at the University of Virginia on why women will never be as successful at macro trading as men:
'Take a girl that was my age at that point in time, particularly back in the '70s. I can think of two that actually started E.F. Hutton with me. Within four years, by 1980, right when I was getting ready to launch my company they both got married. Then they both had -- which in my mind is as big of a killer as divorce is -- they both had children. And as soon as that baby's lips touched that girl's bosom, forget it. Every single investment idea, every desire to understand what's going to make this go up or go down is going to be overwhelmed by the most beautiful experience which a man will never share about a mode of connection between that mother and that baby. I just see it happen over and over. I'm talking about trading, not managing ...'
Back in 2010, Berkshire Hathaway's vice chairman Charlie Munger told students at his alma mater the University of Michigan 'You should thank God' for bank bailouts and those in economic distress should 'suck it up and cope.'
This was an email sent by a Standard & Poors employee prior to the financial crisis.
'Rating agencies continue to create an even bigger monster -- the CDO market.'
'Let's hope we are all wealthy and retired by the time this house of card falters.'
According to the government's complaint against S&P, an analyst wrote a song about the U.S. mortgage market to the tune of Talking Heads 'Burning Down The House.'
Housing market went softer
Strong market is now much weaker
Subprime is boi-ling o-ver
Bringing down the house
CDO biz -- has a bother
Leveraged CDOs they were after
Going -- all the way down, with
Hey you need a downgrade now
Huge delinquencies hit it now
Bringing down the house.'
Back in 2007, then-CEO of Lehman Brother's Dick Fuld sent an email response to the bank's now former chief strategy officer David Goldfarb back in September 2007 where he sounded like a total frat boy.
Fuld, 'I agree we need some help-but the BRos always wins!!'
Of course, we all know what happened to 'the BRos.'
In 2007, an email was sent to some Lehman Brothers' managing directors about a Bloomberg article on Bank of America's CEO Ken Lewis saying a credit bubble was about to burst.
To which Ian Lowitt (who later become Lehman's finance chief in 2008) responded: 'Do we have the balls to be the ones who pull back first to lead the market??'
'I'm managed (sic) to sell a few abacus bonds to widow and orphans that I ran into at the airport...'
And how about the personal messages Tourre sent to his girlfriend, Marine Serres?
'Just made it to the country of your favourite clients!!! I'm managed (sic) to sell a few abacus bonds to widow and orphans that I ran into at the airport, apparently these Belgians adore synthetic abs cdo2.'
Last year, JPMorgan Chase used some embarrassing emails in a counter suit filed against Lehman Brothers.
According to the lawsuit, JPMorgan claims that some Lehman and Barclays employees deceived the bank with bad assets that they were describing as 'toxic waste' and 'goat poo' in emails.
Who says that?
'The subprime market looks pretty damn ugly...' but 'we're very comfortable with exactly where we are.'
Former pageant beauty queen turned stock analyst Danielle Chiesi, who pleaded guilty to participating in the Galleon insider trading scheme orchestrated by Raj Rajaratnam, was told not to put anything in email, according to Fortune.
Still, that didn't stop her from saying a bunch of embarrassing things that ultimately became public during the trial.
Here's one little snippet from the secret phone recordings prosecutors used:
'Do you think in this environment, I know everyone's being investigated, do you think I could buy it here? Honestly? I'm glad we're on a secure line. I appreciate that. What do you think I should really...Should I buy here? I'm a little nervous because people are going to investigate me. I really believe that. Because there are a**holes in this world. Every hedge fund is going to go out of business. And they're jealous.'
According to the New York Post, UBS's Carsten Kengeter was dining with a bunch of senior level bankers in New York in the fall of 2011 when he made comment about how UBS needs to cut costs like a 'Jewish shopkeeper.'
Sources told the Post he apologized weeks later.
Olivier Desbarres, the now ex-director/head of Asia FX strategy at Barclays Capital in Singapore, was caught on a cell phone camera going on an absolutely nasty tirade against construction workers.
In the video, Desbarres calls the workers 'Chinese f------g animals' and threatens to burn their truck down. He's also seen tossing a large piece of zinc into the construction area.
'ReUnion is not strict on IDs so if you have a fake you will be fine. If you don't have an ID… get one!'
In the summer of 2011, a JPMorgan Chase intern sent out the following email from his work account to hundreds of other employees advocating the use of fake IDs. (emphasis his)
What's up guys,
So tonight is going to be wild… ReUnion Bar on 17th and Park Ave @ 10pm. We already have 100+ JPMC interns who accepted the invite, so tonight will be a great opportunity to check out everyone and have an awesome time.
ReUnion is not strict on IDs so if you have a fake you will be fine. If you don't have an ID… get one! Sorry about that, I will push for black 'X's' next time so those without IDs can come hangout, since I want you all to have a great time this summer.
Don't miss out! Tell everyone, it's going to get wild.
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