Broadway Show Thinks Football Fans Don't Know How To Clap

Dan Lauria as Lombardi

Lombardi, a new play about the legendary Green Bay Packers coach, is an unusual fit for a Broadway theatre, but does that mean everyone who goes to see it will be an uncultured Philistine who can’t behave themselves in public? The producers sure thinks so.

The official website for the show starting Dan Lauria briefly posted an FAQ on its website to explain to rookie theatergoers what to expect on their first trip to the big city. The ridiculous and condescending instructions covered everything from tickets (you need to buy one!) to what an usher is for (they take the tickets!) to reminding audience members that they should “laugh at the funny part” and applaud when it’s over:

“Please don’t talk! The actors will be performing live for you. It’s important that you listen very well so that you don’t miss anything and so that you don’t disturb others around you.”

The website took the FAQ down, but not before Time Out New York could capture the best part. And please wipe you’re filthy, football-loving feet on your way in.

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