Last week, Australian Redditor JohnJerryson found out that his wife has been cheating on him for the last decade.
The discovery sparked a lengthy post reflecting on his life in the sub-Reddit r/tifu (“Today I F—ed Up”), called “TIFU My whole life. My regrets as a 46-year-old, and advice to others at a crossroad.”
“I’m a 46 year old banker and I have been living my whole life the opposite of how I wanted,” he writes. “All my dreams, my passion, gone. In a steady 9-7 job. 6 days a week. For 26 years. I repeatedly chose the safe path for everything, which eventually changed who I was.”
Instead of travelling the world and writing the novel he dreamed of in college, connecting with his son, or maintaining a relationship with his wife, John pursued security and wealth — and he regrets it.
John’s story serves as yet another reminder that money can’t buy happiness, and it isn’t everything.
Rather than being proud of a responsible, dutiful life advancing in his career just like many of us aspire to do, he’s sorry that he prioritised earning money over every thing else — even saying goodbye to his dying father.
I rationalized that financial security was the most important thing. I now know, that it definitely is not. I regret doing nothing with my energy, when I had it. My passions. My youth. I regret letting my job take over my life. I regret being an awful husband, a money-making machine. I regret not finishing my novel, not travelling the world. Not being emotionally there for my son. Being a damn emotionless wallet.
John has some advice for the rest of us:
If you’re reading this, and you have a whole life ahead of you, please. Don’t procrastinate. Don’t leave your dreams for later. Relish in your energy, your passions. Don’t stay on the internet with all your spare time (unless your passion needs it). Please, do something with your life while your young. DO NOT settle down at 20. DO NOT forget your friends, your family. Yourself. Do NOT waste your life. Your ambitions. Like I did mine. Do not be like me.