Having the best ideas in the world won’t help you if no one wants to listen.
How well you influence others, he said, is as much about you do say as what you don’t.
Here are the bad habits you need to avoid if you want people to listen to you, which Treasure calls the “seven deadly sins of speaking.”
Speaking badly of somebody else seems to have a chain reaction, Treasure said.
If you engage in gossip, you can give yourself a bad reputation and inspire others to start gossiping about you.
If you fill your conversations with judgments of others, you're making the person you're speaking with self-conscious of being judged themselves, Treasure said.
They will be afraid to open up to you and may shut down completely.
Treasure said that his mother, in her latter years, became incredibly negative -- she would even find the disappointment in arbitrary things like what day it happened to be. Treasure would force himself to stop listening as he spent time with her.
Choosing to be optimistic will simply make you more enjoyable to talk to, he said. Plus, it's better for your health.
Related to focusing on the darker side of life is complaining, which easily becomes a habit.
Before you know it, Treasure said, you'll be known as the person who complains about the weather, the news, work, and everything else. It's what he calls 'viral misery.'
Some people have a 'blamethrower,' Treasure said, putting the blame on anybody and anything except themselves when met with failure.
While others may let the occasional excuse slide, a constant stream of them reveals that you do not take responsibility for your actions.
Exaggeration 'demeans our language,' Treasure says.
Adding dramatic flair is essentially a form of lying, and 'we don't want to listen to people we know are lying to us.'
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