10 Things You Need To Know This Morning In Australia

Austria’s Conchita Wurst. Picture: Eurovision/YouTube

It’s Monday, deal with it. This may help.

1. First, to the markets and Australian ones in particular will likely be quiet ahead of the NAB Business Survey which will give a window into Australia’s corporate health now and into the future. On Saturday, June SPI 200 Futures closed at 5455 bid, largely unchanged after a 28-point range Friday night.

2. In fact, it should be fairly quiet across Asia with no data out of China and second tier data out of Japan covering bank lending and an economic survey. On Friday, the Asia Dow was up 0.38% to 3100.68, the Nikkei rose 0.25% to 14,199 and stocks in Hang Seng rose 0.12% to 21,862. In Shanghai however, stocks fell 0.21% to 2,011.

3. The week finished with bang with this story about the incredible allegations an Australian Bureau of Statistics employee was allegedly disclosing data before it was released. A couple of former Monash University mates may have scooped up to $7 million on the scam. Here’s Greg McKenna on how that sort of thing can really disrupt the system.

4. Inception fans, get excited – scientists in Germany have found a way to induce lucid dreaming. Yep, one day you may be able to tell your dream self to put some clothes on before you go to dream work. It works by running an electrical current through your brain, sparking gamma wave activity. Researchers see the best use for it in helping PTSD sufferers block their recurring nightmares.

5. Telstra has successfully tested a new system of 4G broadband delivery that it says could slash the cost of internet access aboard your plane. Skinet (yes, self-awareness doomcriers, Skynet) stretches current towers signals out from 30-50km to “hundreds”, according to Telstra’s executive director of networks Mike Wright. On a test run from Melbourne to Sydney, it cut the need to use dozens of towers to just four – which could cut the price if passengers show any enthusiasm for sharing rides with mobile phone conversations.

6. There’s talk that Jamie Dimon may be facing an exit from JPMorgan, which according to the New York Post, is “on the ropes”. No longer officially the world’s No. 1 bank, the $2.47 trillion behemoth has laid off 11 per cent of its workforce since 2011 – some 30,000 jobs. One estimate puts the bank anticipating trading revenue to take a $1bn hit for the quarter. Whether that translates to a hit on Dimon waits to be to seen, but the 74 per cent pay rise added to his bank account in 2013 ($20m) puts the pressure on Dimon to deliver.

7. In case you were busy sleeping in on the weekend, here’s a great (and extremely useful) story about one US family of four which gets by on $US14,000 a year. He’s a US Army member in an undergrad course; she’s an incredibly resourceful house manager. And her tips for cutting excess out of the household budget are some of the best business advice we’ve ever passed on.

8. This list of the world’s most popular beaches on Pinterest features an unheralded Australian entry and an amazing, unlikely winner which sets it apart from the usual eye candy lists.

9. BI readers love nothing more than a good startup story. Here’s a classic from the weekend to wake the dreamer in you all, involving a Romanian whose friends told him he was crazy for buying a Commodore 64 and who learnt English from Pink Floyd albums. He recently sold his latest start-up for $500m.

10. Eurovision has been sung and won – by a Bearded Lady. Technically a Frocked Man, Austria’s Conchita Wurst, otherwise known as Tom Neuwirth, caused a stir with viewers, other Eurovision performers and even politicans at home, but there was no stopping the 25-year-old drag artist on the night. She had the title wrapped up with three of the 37 countries yet to cast their final vote.

Here the Best Headline winner from Drudge:

And here’s the performance in case you missed it:

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