1. To markets, and earnings are coming. In the US, we started last night with Alcoa, which was a beat on earnings, but crucially, a miss on revenue. They were snuck out after the close though, and even so, price action on US markets was poor, so expect worse to come tonight. June SPI 200 futures are, down just a point to 4,901, leaving the ASX waiting on positive news from today’s NAB business survey. The US dollar was weaker, lifting the Aussie up near 76 cents, the pound roared and the yen is below 108.
2. The stupidity, it burns. Texas-based firearms maker Precision Firearms LLC filled a special order for a customer who wanted a Glock pistol with some familiar stylings. Familiar to kids who love video games:
We don’t need to highlight the danger this represents to any children who might find the “Nintendo Glock” lying around. Or the security issues of a notoriously hard to detect pistol hidden inside a kid’s toy. Do we? Please say no, you don’t.
Jesus wept. For America.
3. OK, so we might get a new Apple Watch this year. But it’s more likely to be an “S” upgrade than an actual, badly needed redesign which isn’t exactly setting the world on fire. (Still yet to see one in the wild.) Reliable analyst Ming-Chi Kuo from KGI Securities has a research note with some juicy details about what to expect, but all you need to know is blog 9to5Mac reckons you’ll be able to make calls with your face in them and all. Which is, surely, the only reason it should have been invented at all.
4. This is actually epic. Charlie Munger is almost as adored and respected by investors as his boss, Warren Buffett. He just went nuts about the state of finance, comparing those who just trade bits of paper all day to the lords of England. He said people need to do real things if they want to understand their place in the world and if they stuff the economy up then the scene will be set for the next Hitler. And he added that former US Fed chair Alan Greenspan was an “idiot”. Just fantastic.
That’s a vehicle getting blown out from undercover by a US-led aristrike. Precision, huh? And we know it’s a vehicle because in case you missed it, check for the tyres flying though the air out of the smoke. There’s more footage here.
6. The Panama Papers are causing all sorts of trouble and riots in the street calling for world leaders to step down. Apparently, Russian president Vladimir Putin’s aide is involved with $2 billion being squirreled away. So it must just be a coincidence that Putin’s formed a National Guard and they’ve been caught on film practising how to smash protests, or it might not.
7. Google and Microsoft are making giant virtual brains. Obviously getting smashed at Go wasn’t enough of a warning for humans to stop messing with AI, but it’s actually taken us since 1943 to get it to that point. And Google chief Eric Schmidt says artificial brains will be behind every meaningful tech IPO over the next five years, so best get prepared for your Skynet future now.
8. The new “Game of Thrones” trailer is here, and it’s not looking good for the Starks, who really haven’t had a great run of it for four years now, so you know it’s bad.
9. Tony Robbins has loads of great stories from his journey to becoming a guru for billionaires and celebrities. This one is no exception – it’s about how he landed his dream job at 15 and his mum told him he couldn’t take it because his ego was already too big. Here’s why he hated her, then loved her for it.
10. Nawww. Donald Trump is all crosspatchy because it looks like the Republicans are going to rig it so he won’t represent them in the US presidential elections. Sadly, he may have a point.
BONUS ITEM: Even dying car alarms are better than the music kids listen to these days:
Have a great day.