10 things you need to know this morning in Australia

It’s the waiting we can’t stand. Picture: Getty Images

Good morning and welcome to UK General Election Day. Or, as we like to call it here in Australia, Friday.

1. UK general election live. We’ve got all the updates as they roll in from our UK team. BBC’s exit poll has the Conservatives winning 316 seats, Labour 239, SNP 58, Lib-Dems 10 and UKIP 2. Here’s the round-up of what else is happening:

2. But all the real action is in Scotland, where Sam Heughan is making the ladies swoon in “Outlander”. One site billed it as “Game of Thrones for soccer moms”, but the general feeling is, 2.5 million women are very, very happy with the TV adaptation of Diana Gabaldon’s eight novels to date. For the uninitiated, it’s all about a WWII nurse transported back in time to swords-and-kilts Scotland, and her romance with a dashing Highland warrior. Here’s 5 reasons why “Outlander” is killing it.

3. So, to the local market yesterday, which bounced right off the 200-day moving average. That’s important for technical traders who seem to be driving this bus as much as anything else. Yesterday the banks recovered a little and last night’s move in the US will also help. But the fabric of the market, in a technical sense, has been damaged, so traders will be wary of getting too bullish on the local market unless there is a sharp and solid recovery offshore.

4. We have another huge day in data, with the market hanging on the release of the RBA’s SoMP at 11.30am. Traders will be looking for forward guidance but this is often a backward-looking document. Chinese trade, German trade and IP tonight. Non-farm payrolls. Oh my.

5. Global bonds have been selling off. As a result, yields have shot up, prompting Gluskin Sheff’s David Rosenberg to take a look back. A 500-year look back. And here’s what he found out about rates – today’s lows have only been this low before twice, in the 1570s and 1930s.

6. Pirate treasure is real and Captain Kidd’s may have just been found. Kidd was a former pirate hunter who turned to a life of very successful high seas crime before being hanged three times. He was also an inspiration behind “Treasure Island”. Now the evidence his booty is real is a 50kg bar of silver found in waters off the island of Sainte Marie in the wreck of Kidd’s ship, the Adventure Galley. Treasure hunters have been looking for it for 300 years.

7. Macquarie Bank smashed it with full year profit results. It’s up 27% to $1.604 billion, well ahead of market expectations of about $1.45 billion, and its second best result on record. That’s a 14% increase in operating income to $9.3 billion.

8. China’s best cheerleader finally goes cold. Morgan Stanley’s Asia/Pacific team have downgraded the MSCI China stock exchange to equal weight after almost seven and a half years of betting it will outperform. Simply put, the bank says a rally in Chinese shares since last year means companies are now overvalued and could disappoint with future earnings. It now prefers Taiwan, upgrading the country to overweight.

9. There’s a great white shark approaching New York and you can watch its progress on Twitter. “Mary Lee” was tagged in 2012, she’s beautiful and she also has a great sense of humour:

And if you don’t want to know how far giant hungry sharks travel looking for dinner, don’t click here.

10. It’s Friday and if you thought the end of the week couldn’t come fast enough, spare a thought for these 31 people who spent it carrying way too much stuff.

BONUS ITEM: Cadbury is making a chocolate bar WITH VEGEMITE!

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