10 things you need to know this morning in Australia

Don’t despise it. Picture: Getty Images

Happy Friday.

1. Markets. They’re still creeping up in the US as we approach tonight’s non-farm payrolls drop, which has rescued the SPI 200 from its lows. The June contract is up 40 points, 0.8%, this morning. But after three days of unrelenting selling on the ASX, the market has fallen 130 points from Monday‚Äôs close with the ASX200 finishing at 5278 yesterday. It’s made Greg McKenna use the words “Fibonacci retracement”.

And Greg McKenna never uses the words “Fibonacci retracement”.

2. The Aussie dollar is sleepy and going nowhere today, while iron ore might make a bit of a turnaround, if overnight futures on the Dalian Commodities Exchange are anything to go by.

3. Starting a new job? You might be interested in Esqurie’s advice for the newly employed. Or, if you’re like Goldman Sachs Elevator, you’ll quickly realise a turntable is a ridiculous alternative to a PlayStation, and prefer something grounded in the real world, such as:

“Show some leadership by organising drinks and nights out with fellow trainees; get them wasted, especially in the presence of senior colleagues.”

And 13 more proper tips where that came from.

4. Rising house prices aren’t funny. And they’re on the up again in Australia, by 5% in capital cities in 2016. Common sense says it has to end soon, and now, so does the OECD. And when the boom ends, the global body says, things are going to get very messy.

5. Some 150 million people use Snapchat on a daily basis, according to a Bloomberg report. Guess what? That’s 10 million more than Twitter. And it took Twitter 10 years to build that audience, compared to Snapchat’s four. It’s picked up 30 million just in the past six months. And here’s Mark Cuban explaining why downloading Snapchat is a huge mistake and why his messaging app is heaps better.

6. Teslas with an 800km range are coming – one day. CEO Elon Musk said such a thing would be “no problem”, but the right now, the cost of making the battery means it won’t happen for 10 years. But if Musk wants Tesla to be around in 10 years time, he better start finding ways to make the company’s cheapest – and most popular car – the Model 3, profitable. Luckily, he already has, and the end of free energy at a Tesla Supercharger station is in sight.

7. The Niger Delta Avengers announced that they just blew up two Chevron oil wells:

Just a few days ago, the NDA’s “deadline” for all foreign oil companies to vacate the Niger Delta passed. Nigerian oil production has fallen by 46% this year to about 1.1 million barrels a day (as of Monday), down from 2.03 million barrels a day in January. That’s quite a dent.

8. Hey everybody, let’s go to Funtasy Island!

Funtasy Island blue mapFuntasy IslandThere’s too much blue on this map.

But don’t think that just because it’s coloured blue (it isn’t now, anyway) that it’s part of Singapore. That was a bit of a snafu by developers which resulted in Indonesian military troops marching onto the island and sticking Indonesia’s flag in its highest point. Oops.

9. The universe is growing faster than we thought, and could rip itself apart. Adam Riess of the Space Telescope Science Institute and The Johns Hopkins University in the US says so, and he’s a Nobel Laureate.

10. Legal weed. It’s spreading across the US and starting to find acceptance here in Australia. So now is a perhaps a good time to once again go over all the things people still don’t understand about the legal marijuana industry, which chief investor at Poseidon Asset Management, Morgan Paxhia, has done right here, asking us to support the “modern cannabis enthusiast” who is much more sensible than Cheech and Chong, because they “prefer a little cannabis before bed versus a glass of wine, as it helps them sleep and wake up with a clear head”.

BONUS ITEM: Have a great weekend, like this orangutan is about to:

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