10 things you need to know this morning in Australia

Born to act. Picture: Getty Images

Good morning. You’ve almost made it.

1. To markets, and we’re just hours away from US fed chair Janet Yellen materialising at Jackson Hole and putting everyone out of their misery. It’s highly unlikely we’ll see anything other than a hold, but that might at least spark traders into some sort of action. US stocks barely moved again and Greg McKenna has noted a great discussion at PIMCO about the bizarreness of how 34 days of inaction has somehow resulted in investors getting panicky and reaching for certainty. People are strange. The SPI 200 is up 5 points this morning, the Aussie dollar is still hanging tough above 76 cents and iron ore is heading down again.

2. Gold is up 23% this year, but John LaForge, head of real asset strategy at Wells Fargo, reckons the run is over. He’s recommending a look at platinum. It’s “downright cheap at almost $200 per ounce,” LaForge says. Here’s why that makes it a better way to invest in gold than buying gold.

3. So. Many. Robots. Let’s start with Domino’s, which yesterday announced drone delivered pizzas will be a thing very soon, and has been greenlit to start trials in New Zealand. Here’s what it will look like:

4. We have more news on self-driving taxis. Big news, such as they’re already on the road, in Singapore. Now. Uber is still weeks away from rolling out an autonomous fleet in Pittsburgh. And here’s a thing – Pittsburgh has something like 500 bridges, and when you show a self-driving car a bridge, it goes to water and asks you to take the controls. Here’s why.

5. Gah. Someone thought the issue of teen pregnancy in WA needed addressing, so they held a large trial of handing out robot babies which cry all the time to see if it would put girls off the idea. But all it did was want them to have babies even more.

6. Today in Because We Can news, we asked a heart doctor if you can really die from a broken heart. But we really didn’t expect him to say yes, absolutely. And if you think you’re safe because you have a mechanical heart, noted short-seller Carson Block just made a creepy move. He’s betting your pacemaker won’t get broken, but it’s a good chance of getting hacked.

7. We love secret groups. But obviously we can’t condone murder, so we’ll just objectively inform of the presence of the “Mosul Battalion” and leave it with you to decide what to think of their increasing aptitude at assassinating members of ISIS within the organisation’s own borders.

8. In movies, it’s all about this guy:

The Rock started life as a professional sportsman, turned to movies, and this year doubled his income – to $US64 million. Yes, Dwayne Johnson has powered his way to the top of the mountain and is now the world’s highest-paid actor. And it’s time to start cranking up the lunatic “Star Wars” theory mill again. Here’s one that flips everything we know about Rey.

9. Want to see the world’s biggest pearl? This might be it, hauled up by a very happy Filipino fisherman now celebrating the one that didn’t get away.

10. It’s Friday and if you feel like you haven’t achieved anything this week, here are 30 life skills every functioning adult should master. Cut it out and stick it on your fridge.

Have a great weekend.

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