10 things you need to know this morning in Australia

‘And after we’ve had the pig, we’ll have dinner.’ Picture: Getty Image

Good morning, here’s the story so far.

1. To the markets, and it was a nervous night for biotech investors after US presidential nominee Hillary Clinton turned up the heat on price-gouging by specialist drug manufacturers. And in Europe, Volkswagen took a hit too – more about that later. All it means is that the ASX December SPI futures are 23 points higher at 5,082, somewhat disappointing after the physical market lost 104 points yesterday. Greg McKenna reckons markets are unsure and simply bouncing up and down right now.

2. The Aussie dollar is back in the low 71 cent region, Japan is out for a holiday and in data today, we only get the house price index. In China, it’s time for the leading economic index.

3. So, to VW drivers. They have a kind of “Well, that’s what you get for not buying a Volkswagen” vibe about them. So non-VW drivers will enjoy the fact that the company may have been caught installing software that enabled it to cheat on emissions tests. In a big way too – its self-celebrated TDI Clean Diesel engines could be pumping out emissions at up to 40 times the government standard. And it may cost the company $18 billion in fines.

Picture: Forbes

4. “Narcos” is Netflix’s latest hit series, which shouldn’t be suprising given it’s a look at the extraordinary life of Columbian drug lord Pablo Escobar. Suddenly, he’s all the rage again; even Forbes can’t resist revisiting its first international billionaires issue, where Escobar first appeared and stayed for seven years straight, making a high of seventh in 1989. We’ll jump on-board today with 9 facts that reveal the absurdity of Pablo Escobar’s wealth, all of them guaranteed absurd.

5. Speaking of billionaires, Lynsi Snyder is 33 years old and one of the club. That’s because she inherited the cherished In-N-Out burger chain, mainly, tragically, because everyone else in line has died. She’s very secretive, so much to the point that no one knows how many children she’s had to four husbands. Yes, four. But she finally opened up a little bit to CBS recently, and here’s what she had to say.

6. Do you use WhatsApp? Course you do. But here are 9 features you probably didn’t know exist in messaging marvel, which make it even better.

7. The British PM allegedly laid his genitals in the mouth of a dead pig. The claim was made by the author of an forthcoming unauthorised biography of David Cameron. Given he’s a Conservative and a lord, Michael Ashcroft probably didn’t even know he was writing something controversial, and apparently there are pictures, so this should be interesting. As is the choice of tweet involving Cameron’s wife that the new leader of the Labour party, Jeremy Corbyn, favourited, then deleted:

Stay classy, Jeremy.

8. Remember the kid who brought a “bomb” to class, got arrested, then got invited to the White House and Facebook HQ? Now, 14-year-old Ahmed Mohamed is beseiged with gifts at his front door, like this bag of swag from Microsoft:

But now everyone’s cooled down, some are saying his “homemade clock” was actually an alarm clock stripped down. Which is raising some awkward questions about his motives from people like Richard Dawkins:

9. Apple’s App Store was hacked. Here are all the apps affected by the ‘XcodeGhost’ attack and they’re amongst some of the most popular, so you better check it out. And here’s how to make sure you’re protected against it happening again.

10. Here it is – the definitive, No 1, absolutely undeniable sign your coworkers secretly hate you more than anyone else in the office. And how you can fix it and get on with things. In fact – if you’re a man and despised – here are some scientifically proven things to take it to another level and actually start being irresistible.

BONUS ITEM: Pizza Rat is today’s hero. He could have just eaten in, but he chose to take out and share.

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