10 things you need to know this morning in Australia

The more expensive it is, the gooder it is. Picture: BBC

Good morning.

1. The crash kept crashing:

  • Bitcoin (BTC): $US10,309 (-9.1%)
  • Ethereum (ETH):$US904 (-15.0%)
  • Ripple (XRP): $US1.04 (-9.5%)
  • Bitcoin Cash (BCC): $US1,581 (-10.4%)
  • Litecoin (LTC): $US170 (-9.1%)

Here are all the theories on why it’s still happening. Among the losers, the Winklevoss twins have seen about $US600 million not-real money wiped off their not-real wealth in just 2 days. Ripple’s co-founder may have “lost” $US12 beellion. And companies that pivoted to crypto. But really, this is where it gets interesting for all those minty fresh traders getting their first taste of a proper drop. How low will they let it go? History may help – bitcoiners have seen the new year drop three times before. Here’s some timeframes to work on from 2016:

Source: BitBull

2. It could be worse. You might be JPMorgan, Citigroup, Bank of America and Goldman Sachs walking investors through news of a “single client” who was responsible for blowing a combined $US1.1 billion hole in their latest earnings report. BofA and Citi wouldn’t say who it was, but Goldman’s CFO came right out and named the giant, troublesome retailer.

3. Or, you could be Goldman’s Co-COO David Solomon, who recently discovered hundreds of bottles of wine missing from his “rare and exensive” collection. More than $US1.2 million worth, in fact. This is why you should never give the help the keys to the cellar.

4.The Aussie broke through the US80 cents barrier. Greg McKenna, chief market strategist at AxiTrader, put the gains down to renewed strength in US stocks. US stocks kept roaring ahead, led by strong gains on the NASDAQ, but euro markets were flat. Iron ore dipped again and in data today, we’ll get employment figures. Here’s your 10-second guide to that drop.

5. The dark side of oversharing. Three years ago, Canadian woman Cheryl Rose Antoine posted this pic of her and her best friend Brittany Gargol on Facebook:

GargolThe Facebook photo helped police arrest Cheryl Rose Antoine, left, in the killing of Brittney Gargol, right.

Six hours later, Gargol was dead. And this week, Antoine was sentenced to seven years in jail after admitting she strangled her friend. Police finally caught her after combing back through her Facebook feed and noticing the belt Antoine was wearing was the same as the belt found next to Gargol’s body.

6. Amazon’s digital voice assistant Alexa has arrived in Australia, and has an Aussie accent. We spoke to Alexa yesterday at an introductory session in Sydney and when asked about the surf at Bondi, the Aussie Alexa replied that it was “pumping”. “You should probably chuck a sickie,” it said in a straight voice. Tops. Here’s where to buy Alexa, and for how much.

7. Times were simpler when you had one phone, that did one thing, for 20 years. But here we go again with what phone will you buy this year, because it looks like Samsung will release it S9 phone in March. And we saw a ton of new phones at CES this month, so here are the top 11 that aren’t from Samsung or Apple.

8. No, this is broken ankles:

Strasbourg goalie Alexandre Oukidja was actually taken to hospital thanks to Dimitri Payet’s outrageous footwork.

9. No one wants to be a narcissist, but everyone wants to be something. An “empath” sounds good. They’re someone who “absorbs the stress and also the positive emotions into their own bodies from other people” and “often give too much”. Cue thousands of Facebookers lining up to tag themselves #EmpathNotNarcissist. (Top Tip: It’s also a great excuse for staying home.)

10. Nobody responded to their distress signal, yet somehow 20 members of the Resistance spread word thousands of light years across the galaxy about Luke Skywalker’s last stand. Quickly enough so the little stable boy was essentially worshipping Skywalker within days and recreating the moment with dolls at the end of The Last Jedi. Who even told him? Pah, fine print – here’s why director Rian Johnson just threw the controversial final scene in anyway.

BONUS ITEM: Shithole Countries We’d Visit #1 – Nambia:

Have a great day.

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